Ramblings about Halloween Nostalgia

There's something so warm & cozy about the 2000s fall/halloween aesthetic & maybe I just think that because I was a kid at that time so I am partial to it but I do feel there was a deliberate & intentional look to it. I just want to take a moment to appreciate it. 

I grew up in a very religious household so we didn't do halloween, I could watch halloween movies & have halloween treats but there was no dressing up or trick or treating, I think I dressed up once lol & I always credit my love of halloween to my lack of it at home as a kid. I am religious now but I'm a believer that the devil doesn't get to have a day, "This is the day which the Lord hath made; we will rejoice and be glad in it." So my memories of Halloween decor come from shows, movies, stores, & school. School is a big one because my elementary school really knocked it out of the park, I often think of the low lighting in aftercare, the string lights in the library, the little paper pumpkins, cobwebs, decorated doors, the halloween pretzels in the shapes of bats, ugh what I would give to sneak off & wander during aftercare again or to be huddled around the TV cart with my sister watching a movie & waiting for mom to pick us up.  

I've created a little fall moodboard here & it's just things that incite that cozy, halloween feel. Honorable mention for the window clings! I loovveed the gel window clings - we had Christmas ones & they always smelled like a mix of plastic & our attic, which was kinda gross but in a good way. I also love this very classic halloween color scheme of orange, purple, green, & black! Hot take, I don't think the pink, rainbow, disco ball halloween decorations we see these days give a festive feel at all, they may as well be year round decorations. I want to say that I don't wanna yuck anyone's yum & you should like whatever aesthetic brings you the most joy but I don't think you're supposed to say those things after a hot take.  

Here's what I'm going to be doing to get a bit of this feeling back:

• Reading spooky books from my childhood like Scary Stories to tell in the Dark by Alvin Schwartz, Bunnicula by Deborah & James Howe, & any Goosebumps books 
• Watching nostalgic movies & shows like Halloweentown, Goosebumps, Scary Godmother, Paranorman, Hocus Pocus, & Scooby Doo 
• Trying to use my phone as little as possible! I want to be present & enjoy the little things like slowing down & lighting a candle, looking at falling leaves, & turning on all my little light up decorations. 
• Creating nostalgic fall moodboards 
• Thrifting for fall decor (I feel like a lot of nostalgic finds are there)

I think I'm going to put up my fall decorations this weekend, they usually go up right after my birthday (August 20th) but we just haven't gotten around to it yet so I'm excited for that & I'm sure it'll elevate the super cozy vibe I'm going for. Have you decorated yet or done any fall/Halloween activities?

My favorite fall coffee! ˚˖𓍢ִ໋༄˖°.🍂.ೃ࿔ˎˊ˗ Salted Maple Butter Latte

I was going to post about this in my bookish cafe tab but I feel like it's too delicious to not make an entire dedicated post about! This is something that I look forward to every fall & I always conserve a bit of the ingredients for later on in the year. It's so sweet & comforting!

What you'll need 🍁 

- espresso 

my espresso recs: If you have a moka pot or espresso machine - Illy Classico Espresso, If you have a nespresso - Scuro or Chiaro Pod, If you have no machine - Nescafe Blonde Instant Espresso 

- Salted Maple Cold Foam from Trader Joe's

- Organic Maple Butter from Trader Joe's 

- Flaky sea salt (I think the one I use is Maldon but it doesn't matter lol just make sure it's flaky & yummy - I've always been really strange about salt, I can eat bits of the Maldon salt as a snack it's so yummy!) 

- Oat milk (or whatever milk floats your boat)

Let's make it!!! 

Start with a teaspoon (or more!) of the maple butter, crack a little bit of sea salt over it, then brew a double shot of espresso right over that. If you're using the instant espresso or moka pot go ahead & make your double shot then pour it right over your spoon of maple butter/salt.  Instead of adding our ice to our cute cup 1st we're going to pour our maple-y double shot in, add milk to cool it down, then ice last, this way it's not watered down. Top with the salted maple cold foam & you're done! Little tips - you'll want to use hot water for the instant espresso so that it actually dissolves the maple butter but I have noticed the instant espresso is kinda fussy, you can burn it so be careful of that. If you're brewing the espresso over it you'll still need to take your time stirring it to ensure it all dissolves & incorporates properly. 

Do you have any favorite fall coffee recipes?

Fall Mini Haul

Here's my bit of retail therapy from this weekend! Mostly super cozy, fall stuff even though it's still sweltering hot out. Now, I am really trying to save money (and failing evidently) but these things were calling to me & I needed to restock my Nespresso pods. 

In my Nespresso restock I have my tried & true pods: Nola, Chiaro, Scuro, Dolce, & Voltesso. I also ordered the new Cinnamon Apple Crisp pod. I am going to be brutally honest about the cinnamon apple crisp, I did not like it at all. It left a weird aftertaste in my mouth for the entire day, it smelled heavily like an apple scented candle but then tasted like nothing, & was a little more bitter than I expected. I think for fall coffee pods I'm going to stick with the Pumpkin Spice Cake ones lol. Have you had any yummy fall coffees yet?

Shane & Rick are so tragic

TW: I don't hate Shane (don't hate me lol)

My boyfriend & I have one episode left in s2 of the Walking Dead & oh my goodness, I just feel so deeply about Rick & Shane so I had to write about them. I am a Shane defender, his character & his dynamic with Rick is soooo tragic to me.RIP to my man 💔 I just have such a soft spot for Shane, I think that Rick is so easy to love, he's our classic leading man! He's selfless, kind, & he goes out of his way for people, but Shane is so much more complex, we watch his downfall. (Someone needs to make a edit of them two with the TikTok audio "He is staabllleee you aarrrre deeeeeep" - Rick is stable & Shane is deep) I don't think he's just a villain like I've seen a lot of people paint him to be, I think he's morally grey & misunderstood. I know the show went on for a while so I know there's a lot of character development left for Rick & I wish we could've seen more of Shane. 

I'm sure everything I'm about to write has already been thought & said because how old this show is & I don't have really groundbreaking or thought provoking opinions but I just wanted to yap about it because I love them!!! They make my heart hurt. 

They had very real love for each other & that makes me so emotional, they were best friends, they grew up together, they were partners together & had each other's backs, they wanted deeply to help each other. 

"You think I'd shoot Rick? That is my best friend, that's a man that I love, I love him like he's my brother" 

From Shane visiting & talking to Rick in his coma & trying to get him out of the hospital bed to Rick giving Shane a chance to drop his gun & not kill him, they wanted to save each other. Neither one of them wanted to kill one another. 

Sure, maybe Shane did go crazy & lose the plot but I think that hurt him as well. Thinking about the way he looked at himself in the broken glass when he tried to kill Rick with the wrench, he looked scared of himself or like he had the awareness that what he was doing was not right.It seems like for a moment he kinda softens & maybe I'm misinterpreting the way that he looks here but it looks like he has a small moment of remorse but then can't really stop because in his head everyone is in danger because of Rick & on top of that, he's spiraling with envy. He's in an impossible position. 

Trying to kill someone who was like a brother to him must have weighed heavy on him & I do feel like even towards the end he still had a respect & love for Rick that conflicted with his bitter feelings towards him. And there's a bit of a parallel here I think, Shane must have been grappling with conflicting thoughts of loyalty & respect for Rick & this idea that he has to protect the ones he loves & to do that he must hurt his friend.Rick must have been grappling with something similar when he had to stare down the barrel of his friend's gun & hope that he would drop it so he wouldn't need to kill him, there must have been conflicting thoughts of loyalty & love & respect & the idea that he has to protect his family & to do that he must hurt his friend. 

They're literally 2 brothers hardened & turned against each other by circumstance & that is so heartbreaking. No more gentle touches, no more supporting each other, no more Shane reining himself in for the sake of his friend, no more patience, just betrayal, violence, & grief. 

I think Shane really did try, he tried to follow Rick's lead, he tried to get over Lori, he tried to do what he thought was best for everyone. I feel like at every turn he was just trying to protect people & sure, he went about it the wrong way but I can't sit here & pretend like Rick made all the right choices either. They're all in a terrifying situation, no one actually knows what to do, & Rick was doing exactly what Shane was! He was making choices that he thought was for the best, he was trying to be a good leader, be there for everyone, & keep everyone safe, the only difference is Shane was brutal & had a selfish streak (in that he only cared for himself, Lori, & Carl) Rick is not. 

Their last moment together was steeped in anger, betrayal, bitterness, & desperation. I could be misinterpreting the whole thing but this is what I think, they're just so tragic to me, I love them.  

August Faves ‧₊˚❀༉‧₊˚.

I am so ready for the fall! I'm back north now, my trip to Florida was really nice & I wanted to make a post about it but I'm not sure that it was eventful enough to warrant that lol. Spending the last of summer down south with my parents was really nice & I cannot wait for the weather to start getting cooler! Before we can move on to the -ber months I wanted to share last month's faves! 

Love to the fangirls

I've never been casual about an interest before, I'm a fangirl through & through. It started with Hannah Montana in elementary school, I had a Hannah Montana notebook/stationary set for school, Hannah Montana games, Hannah Montana lunch box, Hannah Montana everything, I just loved her. Of course I have to mention the MileyWorld fan club, I never got a membership but I wanted one soooo bad! Then it was One Direction, this was the most fangirl I have ever been, they consumed my life. I was genuinely obsessed, I woke up early for their album drops, wrote fanfic, ran a fan account, went to bat in fandom wars, followed every update religiously, re watched their performances over & over, had their posters all over my room, would put on the Up all Night tour DVD & turn out all the lights to pretend like I was at their concert (this occurred multiple times), had copious amounts of merch, they were the only artists I'd listen to (besides Little Mix, Ed Sheeran, 5SOS, & Cher Lloyd - but lets be honest, all the Directioners listened to these artists, it was almost like if you were a Directioner you were a fan of them too by default), they were on my mind for 99% of every day. This era was such a fun one because I was at just the right age where I could love them so deeply & be so consumed with them without the realization that they're random men I don't know lol. I believe you can be a fangirl at any age but there's a sweet spot where you're deeply delusional & it's kinda fun lol. Then it was Superwholock (another peak fandom!), then it was PTV & ADTR & SWS & all the other bands we were obsessed with in the peak Warped Tour era (back when a ticket was $50, not an arm & a leg), then a bunch of smaller/kinda inactive fandoms like ATLA (before covid when it really blew up), then Arcane, then I discovered Kpop & it was Enhypen, New Jeans, Twice, BTS, & Stray Kids. I must say the Kpop Stans are probably the closest to how Directioners were/what that culture was like but they're more problematic. A discussion on kpop Stans is one for another time, as one I have a lot of thoughts!

 That's besides the point, the point is I (as well as all the other fangirls) have always loved deeply & loudly! I'm not gonna lie I'm getting choked up thinking about Directioners & what it felt like being one, it was so special & I feel so bad for the people born without the fangirl gene! Let me get back on topic here instead of writing an essay about 1D & how bad I miss them & how impactful they were on millions of little girls lives. 

I just love fangirls! They're so loving, devoted, passionate, free, & unashamed about the things that bring them joy! I hate how they're shamed, I hate how we look at young women screaming & crying over artists & think "wow they're crazy!" instead of thinking "wow how much love they have, how much appreciation they have for this person's talents, how deeply they can feel & connect with this art that they're brought to such raw emotion, how beautiful that they're experiencing such vulnerability together, how full of love they are!" And this isn't a new thing, throughout decades people have come together to experience this love together & they find community in it & people have painted them to be crazy or hysterical! My aunt loves Prince & my mom loves Michael Jackson just like I love One Direction! Just today I saw a Michael edit on my fyp & thought "wow, if they had edits in mom's day I just know she'd have a whole folder dedicated to Michael's" & it made me kinda sad that they didn't get to experience this. And I'm not trying to be sexist but I think you see more girls than boys in these spaces because it's a testament to the way women love; loyally, boldly, all in, & without regard for what other people might think!Just so beautiful!

Through a mutual deep love for an artist we're able to connect positively & what's so wrong with that? What's the difference between wearing an athlete's jersey & wearing a t-shirt with an artist's face/name on it? What's the difference between collecting baseball cards & collecting photo cards? What's the difference between joyfully screaming when your team scores & joyfully screaming over hearing & seeing your favorite artist? 

My niece recently got into kpop & her mom makes fun of her for it a little bit but I love seeing her do the choreography & hear her talk about her favorite groups! I love being able to bond with her over that! I know when I was younger being a fangirl was not cool, liking One Direction was not cool, but I hope that as time goes on the people on the outside of these spaces can have a little more appreciation for them. Cause let me tell you, these fangirls are full of joy & are super cool! It's not mania or hysteria, it's love & devotion. And can that get a little parasocial? Sure, but not all fangirls are parasocial & I would go as far as saying most are not. In these spaces we made lifelong friendships, we discovered a love of writing or photography or reading, we uplifted one another, I genuinely think being a fangirl is such a healthy & lovely thing, argue with a wall!

The Walking Dead is soooooooooooo sad

I know I'm over a decade late to the party but I'm finally watching TWD & it's so much sadder than I thought it would be. I know literally nothing about this show, I don't know how I managed to avoid spoilers & everything unintentionally but somehow I have. I thought it was gonna be more scary & spooky but here I am crying over a little boy seeing his mom as a walker & a horse being eaten.  I started watching this mainly because I wanted to see Jon Bernthal in something without being super sad (the Punisher I think would make me super sad) so I put this on but I'M STILL SO SAD BUT NOW I'M INVESTED IN THE STORY SO I DON'T WANNA STOP WATCHING. Ya know before I put this on I was like "maybe it'll make me sad, maybe I should save this for another time" & I almost put on Zombieland since it's leaving Netflix soon. 

I sprinkled my dog's ashes on the first day of my period

 

My handsome boy!!!

I know a lot of women don't like the stereotype that a period makes you more emotional, but mine genuinely does! A few weekends ago I was playing It takes Two with my boyfriend & violently sobbed over a stuffed elephant, throwing that cute little stuffed elephant to the ground was not a first day of my period type of activity. Similarly, spreading Milo's ashes was not a first day of my period activity. I did not sob violently, but oh boy the tears were there and my heart was HURTING. 

This boy has my heart, he was my first dog & he showed me how much love I'm capable of. He loved cuddling, he was such a little snuggle bug! He was a rescue & was abused before we got him & he didn't know what cuddling was. Those first few weeks with him I would hold him close & kiss him on the head (sometimes he would try to squirm away & since I was incredibly ignorant about dogs I would hold him there instead of letting him go) & after a little while I wouldn't have to call him to me to be cuddled, he would come right to my lap & lay down. Once he discovered that cuddles & being held & kissed was a good thing he came to love it! He loved kisses! Even on his last day he was bowing his head to be kissed. 

He loved sunbathing! My beautiful, handsome, perfect boy, he always looked so cute soaking up the sun. He had so much love to give. When I moved away from him & left him with my parents I was so worried that he would have no one to give his love to, they didn't hold him or kiss him or let him on the couches & that hurts me but I'm sure it hurts them too. I'm sure they've had to grapple with the regret of not loving him enough & in the way that he knew love (now with their other dog he's allowed to do all the things Milo was not - allowed on the couches & in the bed!), in the same way I grapple with not visiting more often & not spending enough time with him. Ya know, my parents were scared of giving him medications because they thought they'd get bit. Milo used to bite people when we first got him, he was so fearful. And of course he was, all he knew of people before us was the sting of a belt. But he never bit me. The first day I met him he was in a crate & my dad told me to be careful because he bites. But as I said before, I was so oblivious & ignorant on how to interact with animals & care for them so I stuck my whole upper body into the crate with him. I was so excited to meet him! My dad was doing work at a house in Pompano, FL & Milo's old owners (the ones who abused him) moved away & left Milo outside in the hot, Florida sun in a crate with no food or water. My dad went there to work every day & Milo growled at him but my dad made a routine of letting him out to pee & brought him food & water. My parents were both very anti-dog but no one was coming back for Milo so dad brought him home. He was so fearful but he let me scoop him right out of the crate and hold him close to me. He never bit me, he never scared me, they just didn't understand him. My sweet little boy was sweet to the very end. I don't know what else to write because my heart is just feeling heavy. 

It's just weird to think that a dog with so much personality can fit in a little engraved box & the paws that carried him through life are just gone, only a little print in clay. I've said so many times, I'll never get to know another dog like Milo he was just so special. He was clingy & loving & protective & goofy & just the perfect boy! I thank God that I got to know him & that I got to be with him in his final moments. 

I'm pushing 30!!!! (And I don't mind, I love it)

Happy Birthday to me! I'm 27 today & so grateful that God has blessed me with another year!

Every now & then I get kinda sad about getting older but not because I'm not young anymore or because I'm starting to gray (my mom started graying in high school & I also did but I have waayyyy more now lol), it's more of a bittersweet sadness. It's knowing that this life goes by so quickly, I feel like I was just 18 & sneaking out of my parent's house (yes I was sneaking out as an "adult", I have/had very strict parents lol, I didn't get any freedom until I moved out of their house) but now I'm 27, living all the way across the country, I can go anywhere I want & do anything I want. It's weird. It's knowing that my sister & I will probably never live in the same house together again, it's knowing my parents are getting older & one day I won't have them, it's knowing that I have to start thinking about a more serious career path, it's knowing one day I'll have to cook my own Thanksgiving dinner, it's looking back at how much things can change (even in just a few years). 

But, there's also so much sweetness in nearing your 30s. People online like to say "pushing 30" like it's something derogatory but it's not! 

In my late 20s I learned that no one has it together, even my more "put together" friends are just doing their best! I learned not to wallow in self pity, life is truly so beautiful & full of blessings, why should we sit here and be sad about our misfortunes when God has always pulled through? I've learned that it's okay not to know things, in a world where everyone shouts into the void & pretends to be an expert on everything be vulnerable enough to admit you don't know certain things, change your opinion, be genuinely open to learning & listening to people talk who think differently from you, don't lock yourself in an echo chamber!I've learned that the cure for everything, the way you get through this life is with Christ & nothing can compare to Him! No amount of any vice will bring you the comfort that Jesus does! He's walked me through grief, insecurity, addiction, He's delivered me from suicidal thoughts & depression & self harm. I've been through things I thought would have broken me just a few years ago but with Jesus in my life now, the suffering is bearable, I don't have to do it alone. Jesus really is the answer! I've learned that friendship comes at a price, give your friends grace! As women I think we struggle with this, when your friends hurt your feelings or offend you remember they're people too! We're all capable of being a little insensitive or accidentally hurting one another & grace is a beautiful gift! I've learned to hold my tongue, I've always been someone who comes out super hot when I'm upset but this is a mistake. Let yourself sit with your emotions for a day or 2 before spewing them onto people, don't say things in the heat of the moment! I've learned that contrary to what the internet says, my life is just beginning!My fellow late 20 year olds, enjoy this time! We're at a weird in between point, not quite a kid & not quite a qualified adult. Dance, laugh, learn to love yourself, chase God with everything you've got & keep running back to Him, try new things, be cringe & free!!! And remember, if you're hanging on by a thread let it be the hem of His garment!

What I bought at the Korean Grocery Store 

I'm trying my best to save money but I'm going to Florida to see my parents for my birthday & I had to run to the Korean grocery store to pick up some toner pads I'm running out of. They don't carry these at Ulta or Target & my parents live in the middle of nowhere so it was important I got around to grabbing them this past weekend. Of course while there I had to pick up some other goodies!

The Toner Pads are the Round Lab Pine Calming Cica Pads - these are a newer addition to my routine & I usually hold off on trying too many new products as a sensitive skin girly but I love these! I use them in the morning & I've noticed my skin is a lot smoother & softer! 

There are 2 drink pouches in my picture & of course, we bought an ice cup & an additional drink pouch for the drive home! The Cafe Real Shine Muscat Ade is our absolute favorite! I saw Jake have a muscat drink in an En-O'Clock episode (I love Jake what can I say, shout out Engenes!!!) so the first time we were at this store & I saw their selection of drinks I had to try that one. Both me & my boyfriend love it & every time I'm at this store I make sure to pick up an extra one for him to enjoy if he's not with me. He picked up a melon ade as well in the spirit of trying something new. 

The Hi-Chew Fantasy mix is another one of my boyfriend's picks & not gonna lie, these are soooooo yummy. Also in the spirit of trying new things, I picked up the Carbonara Turtle Chips (I usually just get the choco churro flavor) & these Loopy Tteokbokki shaped chips in the rose flavor. 

Lastly for the tried & true snacks, I picked up a white cookie pepero (the one with Bangchan ofc since he's my bias), Jagabee fries, Buldak Carbonara tteokbokki, & songpyeon. We did also pop in to the kpop store right across the street but I was feeling sick so we had to come home asap. All in all, successful trip! 

Is it pumpkin spice time yet?

Surprise, surprise I'm once again thinking about fall! 

I'm going back home to Florida next week & I'll be returning home up north right at the end of August, which is perfect because my last 2 weeks of Summer will be in the most summer-y place (SO SO SO EXCITED TO GO & EAT BARBECUE & SIT ON MY PARENT'S SCREENED IN PATIO!!!) & then I'll be home right in time for fall. I know it doesn't technically start until the end of September but in my calendar, halloween & fall starts immediately after my birthday (August 20th). So September 1st is the start of fall, argue with a wall. 

To get into the fall mood I have a few things I'm hoping to do before heading down South. My boyfriend & I always have a huge list of movies to watch & activities to do around halloween time & most of the time we never get through all the things so I like to stretch fall activities as far as I can. 

(I went to B&N last weekend with my boyfriend & only bought one book because I'm trying to save money but I had my eye on these because I just wanna get into fall already! I joked that we could go back this weekend & get an early birthday present - which my boyfriend did agree to but he also pointed out a few months ago I asked for a switch 2 for an early birthday present which he also bought me. Lesson learned, I am horrible at the whole early gift thing lol) 

YA books I'm going to get this weekend: 

I'm also going to attempt a themed movie night or 2, I'm thinking Coraline because I saw someone on TikTok make button shaped cookies (do you think that would work fine as chocolate chip cookies cut out in the shape of buttons rather than the colored sugar cookies?). Then I'm going to try to update my fall TBR & movie/show queue. What are you doing in preparation for possibly the coziest season?

It's soup season & I loovveeee miso soup!

I am not feeling well at all today, I had no clue what to eat for lunch but then I remembered I have almost all the ingredients for miso soup!!! Plus it's officially fall (to me) & this is the perfect time for soups! Do you remember the first time you had miso soup & really loved it? (not all miso soups are created equal, trust me!) I do, it was from China Sky in Loxahatchee, FL. I still think about this little restaurant. Loxahatchee is a big city now but when I first moved there with my family this was 1 of only 2 or 3 restaurants in town. Anyways, I recently got miso soup from a restaurant & it was so painfully mid, I don't know how you mess up a soup this simple (it's got like 4 ingredients!) but somehow they did. This led me to learning how to make it & it's way easier than you think!

It's actually so easy to make & I highly, highly recommend giving it a try! Also, if you're a sensitive tummy girly like me this is such a good meal for when you're dealing with those troubles. It's full of probiotics & it's great for gut health!

Here's how to make it 

1. Add 4 cups of water & 2 tsp of dashi to a pot, bring to a boil
2. If you're doing wontons instead of the tofu now is the time to toss them in, reduce heat to a gentle simmer 
3. Through a strainer, stir in 3 tbsp of miso paste, I like to rest it right on top of the pot so it's dipped a little bit into my broth & stir in the paste. The strainer catches any graininess so you don't have that in your broth - side note: don't boil your miso paste! When you boil it, you lose some of the nutritional value. 
4. Add in your cubed tofu (I like using silken tofu) & wakame (be careful with how much you add, the first time I made this I added waaayyyy too much. I do about 1 tbsp of it now)
5. Top with scallions
   
6. Pop on a comfort show, pray over your meal, enjoy! 

Low self esteem is lame!!!

 And if I said low self esteem & comparing yourself to other people is lame, then what?

I'm going to be extremely vulnerable here, ever since my childhood I have struggled with low self esteem, I hated myself literally for as long as I can remember & as I got older it stuck around. I could sit here & talk about how my earliest memories are family members making fun of me for having a unibrow, my peers making fun of me for my puffy hair & hairy arms in the elementary school hallways, I could talk about how boys would point at me in middle school & loudly say to their friend "YOU LIKE HER" before letting out a wild laugh, I could talk about going into the following list of my first real boyfriend & seeing it just be a catalog of skinny, blonde, white women (skinny, blonde, white women, you are so so so beautiful!!! This was just a hard moment for me because I am in fact, a very Indian looking Guyanese girl).  I could rehash all these moments but they don't really matter. People can be cruel, we can be cruel, & we are so judgmental towards others but even more so to ourselves. I can't tell you all the nasty things I have said to myself, I am my biggest bully. 

I've struggled with self esteem & comparing myself to other people for a while now & it's just silly! There's no need to compare when there's beauty in everyone! People come in all shapes, sizes, & colors, we're all different but all beautiful in our own ways! God intentionally made us, who are we to sit here & talk badly about His creation? He made stars, deep blue oceans, thriving rainforests, sunsets, flowers, galaxies, snowflakes, everything we look at in awe, He made & then when He made you He decided that you're even better than all those things. You're worth more than all those things! God crafted you by hand, He held you & made all your features. Remember that before you start to compare yourself to other people, you are both made by the King of Kings & He loves you so much that He went to the cross for you! 

Low self esteem is so lame, why are we doing it?! It's not the truth, it gives bully & mean, most of the things we tell ourselves we would never say to other people because it's simply disgusting! 

Psalm 139:14  "I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well."

Lazy-ish Days Diary / Yap

 ⊹₊ ⋆.𖥔 ݁ ˖⋆.ೃ࿔*:･٠ ࣪⭑

Happy Sunday cozy peeps! I am so tired & feeling like I'm getting a little cold, but this weekend was nice & lazy-ish. I say lazy-ish because a true lazy day for me is spent doing absolutely nothing, literally sitting on the couch, watching TV, & playing video games all day. Saturday did start out super chill & to be vulnerable here, kinda miserable. I woke up with a horrible headache & irritated. I know why I was so upset but it was nothing that spending time in God's presence couldn't fix! I bible studied, prayed, cried, & cuddled with my dog, all (except for the crying part) a recipe for a great morning! 

The verse of the day on Saturday in the Bible app was Isaiah 40:31, but those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint. I'm in a place right now where I'm just feeling unsure & weak, this verse was so grounding for me (as God's word always is). In seasons of waiting or uncertainty we can place our hope in the Lord & while we may still struggle with feelings of uncertainty & fear we can know that God is faithful, He's always good, He establishes our steps, He's always working for His glory & for our best (even when we can't see it), & His promises are true! We can cling to these facts through hard times & we don't have to feel bad when we feel things like fear or anxiety, God sees those feelings & is here for us. Nothing is too much for Him, you're not too much for Him! 

Of course with a morning Bible study over the weekend you need a good coffee! I made a cookie butter latte using the Illy classic espresso & Chobani cookie butter creamer, so so so yuuummmyyyy! ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ After a walk with my sweet puppy, my even sweeter boyfriend handled breakfast! First up was the Whole Foods cranberry walnut bread with Kerrygold salted butter. This was our first time trying it & it was super delicious⭐⭐⭐⭐, it reminded me of the Pepperidge Farm Cinnamon Swirl bread before it was recession-ified (it used to have way more raisins in it). My parents used to buy that bread as a treat, it was an every once in a while thing & always felt so special when we got it. Then some tater tots while I played pokopia ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ My boyfriend has been really into an egg with tater tots & it really hits the spot! 

Then to just get out of the apartment a bit we went shopping. The original plan was to pop into Michael's to buy frames for some prints we bought at an art fair a year or so ago & maybe supplies for punch needling. As you can guess, we got very distracted. This was also our first time taking our puppy out in a stroller, I usually just hold her & that shortens our trips in stores because she is a little bit heavy. 12 lbs starts to feel heavier the more & more you walk. We ended up perusing the halloween decorations, popping over to Old Navy to browse, & then stopping in at Target (we went in for chocolate chips & ended up spending over $200). My most joy inducing purchases are down below.

All in all, a warm weekend! Today (Sunday) I'm going to make some taco soup & just chill. Potential cold aside, I am just yearning for fall & a warm soup fits that vibe! Maybe we'll even pop on a Halloween movie! 

 ⊹₊ ⋆.𖥔 ݁ ˖⋆.ೃ࿔*:･٠ ࣪⭑

Summer is over party!!!

 I am absolutely yearning for fall !!!🍂

I'm watching twilight as I make this, my first bloooggg pooossstttt! I am just absolutely craving fall. I used to think Summer was my favorite season but I think that's just because I'm from South Florida so that's really the only season I've ever experienced, besides a few days of Winter while visiting family in New York. Moving to a state with all 4 seasons was an adjustment but I must say, fall is so special. Like I've often thought if I have to move I don't think I'll go back to South Florida, I'd need to be somewhere that gets a little chilly & starts looking orange kinda. I love a sweater, pumpkin spice everything, watching cozy & warm & kinda dark movies, watching the leaves turn, going to a cider mill, UGH I am a fall girl through & through & I thank God I came here & learned that. Let's prepare for fall! 

Harry Potter & the Sorcerer's' Stone, Twilight, Scooby Doo, Halloweentown, Hubie Halloween, The Nightmare Before Christmas, & Coraline are the absolute essentials to get into the fall mood. Shows like Gilmore Girls, Supernatural, Scooby Doo Mystery Inc, & Tokyo Ghoul are also so autumnal. Can I interest you in some treats to go with? 

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Not to toot my own horn but the focaccia & ghost pizza are both homemade! I'm linking the Focaccia Recipe. For the pizza it's just store-bought refrigerated dough, store-bought pizza sauce, & mozzarella cheese. To get the ghost shape we used a cookie cutter & for the eyes & mouth we used different sized straws. I love love love trader Joe fall items & some of my faves that I purchase multiple of are the petite pumpkin spice cookies, the pumpkin spice cake, & the butternut squash mac!!!

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So many magical things about fall I cannot wait!!!